A Chief's gotta hang his helmet somewhere!


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1 | Murph says:

My favorite. For a superintelligent A.I., Cortana does say some stupid things

2 | TheCheif says:

I always wondered why the HECK Cortana says that. It's already more than obvious that a tunnel made out of metal in a certain fashion must lead somewhere. Did three year olds program her or what?

3 | Stalker1 says:

lol ya really some intelegence

4 | Rinon says:

God i hate cortana. "There appears to be an oppening in the side of the mountain." WOW! I never would have noticed!

5 | hunterkilla says:

Great comic. It proves a point. Cortana needs to shup up and say stuff which we don't know.

6 | Zorkan says:

Cortana can get annoying sometimes. And that is one of the stupidest things she's ever said!

7 | JJiggssaw says:

god i've always hated that line

8 | revusee says:

well ya she says some dumb things but think about it... if your computer came to life as a digital being, wouldnt you expect it to say things like that?

9 | Nathan says:

it IS the stupidest thing she says

10 | steven says:

Hey think about it what if you were
some new person and didn't know where to go?!HMMM...? Plus Cortana
knows how to detnhate ships!

11 | Some one Relatively Important says:

I wish you could shut off cortana.

12 | someone you shouldnt talk to says:

one word: DUH!!!

13 | Yayap and Zuka says:

Zuka: Ha! stupid human A.I.s

14 | Timmm says:


15 | Again Timmm says:

What does the 'I' stand for?

16 | shorty says:

are you serious?

A- Artificial
I- Intelligence

AI- Artificial Intelligence

a cortana reply

17 | I says:

Hahaha, this is probably my favorite HALO Babies comic. Keep up the good work...like you have been doing...

18 | WuClan says:

FYI Chief HAS to carry cortana around. REMEMBER THE BIGINNING OF THE GAME?!?! HE HAS TO KEEP HER SAFE! (captians order!!!)
although i wish you could shut her off, maybe for five nminutes

19 | ummmmmm...... says:

hmmm....it's all metally....DUH! of course it's not a natural formation! *slap's head*

20 | Suka 'Ramamee says:

I'm jealous. The AI on my ship can't even tell me how many claws I'm holding up! whenever I ask it ( even if I'm not holding up any) it just says 'thursday'.

21 | General Smeagol says:

Maybe Cortana IS super-intelligent, and thinks that cyborgs (like MC) are too stupid...

22 | Madee says:

I don't see why they call her an AI. She may be artificial but I don't think she's very intelligent.

23 | Dragoon says:

this tunnel inst a natural structure it was definatly man made, well duh, lightbulbs dont just appear in tunnels my them selves ,i agree with madee, cortana may be artificial but she is definatly not intelligent

24 | WARTHOG FREAK says:


25 | HaloChicka says:

Not if you dont get the warthog...
but i always do. Warthogs are the shit!

26 | ansomble28 says:

Hmm... This website is not a natural formation. It was developed, which means someone built it... scanning the web for life forms.

27 | eliteghost01 says:

I am so sick of Cortana saying the most obvious things! I'm surprised that the MC never yells: "Will you please shut down!"

28 | eliteghost01 says:

The only character that is more annoying than Cortana is 343 Guilty Spark for these three reasons:

1.He tries to kill you but still be your friend
2. He says the stupidist things at wrong times (ex-singing and giggling while MC is taking on the flood onslaught in the Library.
3. He is invincible! You can never destroy him, no matter how annoying he becomes

29 | Kevin says:

I agree with Ansomble28. Humans= Smart. Holografic pain- in the- asses = Exactly what the last 3 words pain in ass I mean, Hell with cortana. There is a big hole in a wall. At LEAST humans get to the point.

30 | AI... whatever says:

More like artificial stupidity
for starters its not even a cave its a tunnel, its also made out of metal, has lighting and is the squarish, how can she think we missed all that? does she really think were that stupid??? and one last question... does she have a mute button, that would be helpful:)

31 | a guy says:

what i dont get is that throught the wholoe level there are lights telling you whar to go. who put em thar. if humans did...-grunt- hey! elite master, llights going into a hall-like thing let's go-- oh look!humans! get em!
and if d covies did it, then -elite- hey! lets put out lights as to invite some superstrong human with kickarse armor into here so he can rescue the humans

32 | Xerro says:

The Forerunners put the lights there, they did build Halo, or have you not been listening to the Cut scenes attentively?

33 | Gold_Elite says:

Eh, when your playing on the Library, you DO begin to miss her.

34 | Kano 'Takazanamee says:

That happens to you too Suka? Mine says "Do you want fries with that?" and occasionally gives me some kind of screen that's blue...it gives me nightmares about it coming to kill me.

35 | Kano 'Takazanamee says:

I just went into HMT and changed all of cortana's stupid lines into funny ones that I recorded....Instead of the not a natural formation one, I put Hey, dumbass! Drive through there! Human technology is so easily hax0r3d, as they say.

36 | Halo fan...natic says:

i know a stupider line than that:

"when the engines detonate they will create a temperature of nearly 100-million degrees. we don't want to be there when they blow."

how much more obvious can you get?

37 | Isna Noselee says:

Cortana may be smart, but she sure does says stupid things.

38 | De Huntersitter says:

If i hade a wish i wish i could give cortana to the Covenant en BASTA!!!!!!!!!! (tip when you are in the last piece of the maw :warnig blablaa escapin too: go walk en cortana will say_ u can make on foot you need a veichle

39 | halo boi says:

well shes right! a tunnel built by someone can't lead to nowhere

40 | Spartan_117/John says:

*points out to those of us Halo-ers who have read the Halo trilogy books...Deja is more stupid, Cortana is the strobelight compared to that dim, old Spartan II program teacher...no offense*

41 | Death Vomit says:

Well there is a new captain obvious. . . .Cortana congrats
Spartan117 you pants?

42 | Bloorp says:

I like cheese

43 | red fox says:

jesus christ no shit sherlock!!

44 | tpyori88 says:

she always says the most obvious stuff. like near the end of the Maw level she's all like "we need to get outta here NOW!!!" sometimes i wish i could just reach in there and bi*#h slap her

45 | zorg5000 says:

tpyori88!!!!! she is hot i will now hunt u down and kill u 4 that!

46 | Vorin says:

and... well... obviously HALO ITSELF isn't a natural formation, somebody built HALO so they must have built this cave.

47 | That Random Guy says:

The only time Cortana was useful was on the third level Truth and Recon-thingymabobarism were she opens a few doors for you and thats it really.

48 | Cloud Tribal says:

If it wasnt for Cortana, Master Chief would've activated Halo and killed all the humans. :|

Good work on the comic. n_n I never really cared when she said that,wasnt really a big deal. :\

49 | Random Hunter says:

Me gots no A.I.
We smarter than stupid Human A.I.
Obviously its not a natural formation, concrete cost money ya know!

50 | Elite3000 says:

Cortana is more like Artawhataly Idiotic. :)

51 | DTM :) says:

Funny. This is one of the best comics yet (HALO IS COOL)

52 | Fashizzle ma Nizzle says:

Maybe it isn't realy Artificial inteigence but its realy Artifical Ignorance

53 | cortana is stupid...part 1 says:

HI! my name is cortana.traning sessoin 1. SURVIVE MY EVIL STUPIDY!!!!! .... duh...duh... cor. never gets to the frekin point DAMIT! (imatation) blah,blah blah,blah blah blah blah blah!blah blha?blah.blahblah!

54 | Morpheus says:

She talks ON AND ON AND ON! She analyzes and scans so much she'll see EVERYTHING ON CHIEF....

55 | Jonme says:

When I went back to play halo on harder levels, I turned the sound off and listened to music. ... Now that I think about it, Country it probably better than Cortana... *hates country style music...with a passion*

56 | Sun Tzu says:

You are incorrect, I am afraid. Carbon-based life forms can be so irritating... AI's such as Cortana or myself understand two key things about Spartans. First, Spartans are trained for war as soldiers, not as leaders - they follow commands, and avoid acting independently unless in a combat situation. A command to reinforce the obvious is very helpful. Second, Spartans are not too bright. Look at it as the MC, not as a player; his reaction would be more of a "wtf is that?"

57 | mr face says:

whatever, maybe some spartans are dum, but 117 rules! thats why they put you in his suit... anywayz cortana sux, i hate her, her mouth doesnt move, she purple, shes ugly, shes stupid, shes an @$$ sometimes(most of the time), did i mention she sux?

58 | marine says:

well she hasnt said you got mail

59 | L33tNinj4Squirr3l says:

Some days I wish my computer was more like Cortana...It would be all the more fun to SMASH IT!!

*pulls out a sledgehammer* Aaaah...the greatest tool known to man: The Purifier!
(yes I named my sledgehammer. yes, I have been arrested for bringing it to school. I got tackled by a policeman! It was SWEET!)

60 | Teh_Grishnakh says:

when i played that level 4 the first time, i din't see it. i was screaming at cortana "where is it you stupid pile of [[censored]]?!!?"

61 | The Grunt says:

well at least cortana's a bit less irritating than 343

62 | Skally says:

Cortana isnt as hot a some people say,she's a f***ed up old Biotch

63 | cortana is stupid says:

OMG! I agree with almost everybody. "This is not a natural formation-well, a big 50 FOOT HOLE IN A MOUNTIN IS NOT NOTISIBLE! ooooooooooooo! i never knew!

64 | heritic says:

theres your sign.... I love the blue collar comedy tour.

65 | me! says:


66 | Ruhiel says:

I hate that part. The last frame makes it enjoyable though, good one ^_^

67 | master chief says:

i agree with halo fan......natic the 100 milloion degrrese thing is alot stupider

68 | Cortana is an idoit says:

I think i just noticed a hole in a mountin Cheif. Analyzing...
AHA! whe have to go through the mountin. Good thing there's this hole here, right? Yes.

69 | Balefire1 says:


Don't you remember THE LIBRARY?!?!?!?

You went without Cortana for twelve hours and what happened?

MC may be a great fighter, but if you take away Cortana and her obvious statements, he'd be more of a danger to the human race than the covenant ever were!!

70 | fangirl says:

[at a edge of a cliff]*lauph real hard and fall off the cliff*AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

71 | The spark of Guiltyness says:

I've always found Cortana's voice comforting. Remeber the libary? *Shudder* As stupid-ass as she can get you all know you would rather her state the obvious then say nothing at all.

72 | Espilon says:

Well,it must lead somewhere!

73 | Soldier Girl says:

Being intelligent and being smart is two very different things.
You think she at least could give you a hint when youre trying to find youre way out of a cave or something...

74 | commando elite(the ones from halo 2) says:

stupid human ai.

75 | 008 says:

Maybe AI stands for ancient inteligence. Maybe she was the origional program for the first computer.

76 | commando elite(the ones from halo2) says:

like i said, stupid human ai. stupid stupid.


77 | fagman says:

Lol i remember that on the game. the second level, i was playin and saw this huge steel entrane to a tunnel, and Cortana says "This cave must have been BUILT!" and my friend looked at me like Halo was for stupid pelple.

78 | a man says:

Lol i remember that on the game. the second level, i was playin and saw this huge steel entrane to a tunnel, and Cortana says "This cave must have been BUILT!" and my friend looked at me like Halo was for stupid pelple.

79 | Masterchief evil says:

no ya think cortana???!!!

80 | Jarocks says:

Well she was stupid enough not to tell you "Oh and by the way halo was built to kill all seintent life"
But balefire1 was right the first words master chief said when you got into the control room was "how can we use halo against the covenant"

81 | 343Guilty Imgonnashootyouall says:

Its amazing. Cortana can hack any computer and know anything instantly and yet she is so stupid.

82 | Merle-045 says:

I'd love to see ya get around Halo and Truth and Reconcilation without her unlocking doors for ya and whatnot. I think we all known she says obvious stuff sometimes but she gets ya places faster with the nav points and on the Covie ships unlocks doors and stuff. So I am really sick of the complaining. Good comic strip though. Keep up the good work.

83 | {SS}Ogie says:

you know in halo2 when cheifs on the covedent ship cortana UNLOCK THE F^%KING DOORS!!!!! I mean god your in the ship hacking any non human sonofa b^%(# unlock the DOORS THAT LEAD YOU TO YOUR OBJECTIVE i mean lead me to A weapon cache of fule rods swords and a shotgun with ammo and i can tear threw any coedent b@$%3D that trys to kill me or flood....OR THIS "I hacked into the covedent battle net it seams there actully talking on uncontroled chanles ...we should show them who there dealing with. cheif im going to use our suits AI com syestm to moater there chatter" ummm HELLO WAKEUP call"we should show them who there dealing with" THEY KNOW ALRIGHT! cheif and his marines that blow you up!(lialry blow "YOU" up)or look another lifeboats HEADING IN FAST we should yada yada yada im mean NO DIP there heading in fast they came from space and are going to hit the fround! or we should rescue them....... no i thought you save jonson(or let them die)and jump on the dropship and let the marine on the warthog kill himself.

84 | bungie says:

ITS true it can lead some wear i gess never listen to cortana shes wrong sometimes?

85 | ber Grunt says:

(ber Elite Commander of Grunt) The demon's A.I. is a computer and a computer always displays obvious directions and she just says them like Macintoshs do now.

86 | Zonic says:

You dont know how right you are Uber Grunt.

87 | unngoy friend says:

says what we all think, no duh

88 | Master Chief Gangster says:

I think Cortana's cute. Lol!

89 | Cortana says:

Dont dis cortana she's awesome! Even if she does state the obvious sometimes... dont we all?

90 | the one free man says:

yea that was dumb.
but when on the Maw she say "don't be there when it blows" i think it was more of a joke.

but during "2 betrayals" she was dumber than ever. during the cutscene 343 says "the installlation has a radius of 500 000 light years" a minute later when u get out cortana says "i can't even BEGIN to calculate the pulse's range".

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